All you NEED to know

Heart broken, mood in the gutters,  questions plaguing your mind. Why this again? Why me?  Truth is, It's not you. I know you're pretty/handsome enough, kind enough,  funny enough. You are in fact everything and more. It's just that(no one knows why exactly)Love picks some people and it doesn't pick others, (so, you could be all these things and more, yet love wouldn't "find" you). Love happens in the most unexpected places and at the most unexpected times. So, till your time and season comes, till it picks you, you might as well sit back and enjoy the ride because nothing you do is going to make it pick you faster. This is why it is i mportant to have emotional condoms.  What this does is to offer you some sort of protection while also allowing you the freedom to be you. The whole emotional condom thing is n ot so that you don't fall so fast. But so that you don't move so fast and you forget how amazing you are while you're on the ride. Till...

Move on, they said. Move on? Move on?!! What do you mean, move on?! I just lost a part of me that is never coming back. I carried it for 9 months and all that should be summarized in your mediocre statement- "move on?". Well, no! I don't want to move on, I want to dwell in it and I want to be swallowed up by the emotions that wreck my entire being. I don't want to bath, I don't want to eat, I don't want any of that. I just want to fade away. What do you mean by "You'll give birth to more?" What does that even mean?! No! No! No! I will always have this hollow, I would never be able to replace this precious angel that just left me. I had already named her, I prepared a room full of possibilities for her. How do they expect me to take all that down? How can I stand going home without a bump and without a baby? The baby shower gifts? The now meaningless congratulations and hugs? It's too much to think over, too much to voice out and so, I...

Today, I met someone. Well, not met like met met but... well, when I'm done you'll be the judge of whether I met him or not. I was hurrying to work when I saw him. He had his face mask on as did I and at a location where almost everyone had theirs off  it was like, " hey! mask buddies" and then our eyes met. You know how movie scenes zoom in on one character and then the other, all the while they're staring at each other so intently. That's how that moment felt 🤭😅 He had a caramel coffee colored eyes, one that is so rare in Nigeria and so, that in itself was a reason to stare. In an alternate universe, I walk up to him and say, hi, your eyes reel me in and begs me to stay. It has answers to the questions I didn't even know I had.  But... in this universe, I'm running late for work and I'm beginning to look like a creep staring and smiling. Thankfully, you couldn't tell that I was smiling, thanks to the face mask. So, yea,  I met someone an...

The joy that comes with finding the person you've been trying to stalk! My God!! It is like fresh air after stepping out of a crowded space; like the brightness of the sky after a storm and the relief that comes with passing out gas🤭🤭.  It causes you to ask yourself questions like; Why can't you use the same name everywhere?  Do you realize how hard you make it to stalk you?   Now, I have to search mutual friends and go through their well of their followers🌚.  I guess that's the reason one experiences Joy after finding their "stalking interest"- delayed gratification they call it. It feels like,"Yea! I did that!" Why am I stalking you, someone may ask; well, it is simple really-  To see past your composure. To be in your room without you seeing me, and just watch you. I enjoy watching you, seeing you in your element you know, just doing you with no inhibitions whatsoever.  Totally random, but ha ve you ever noticed how a jeweler shows his best diamo...